Britney Spears Fires New Assistant Shannon Funk

Kidnapper Britney Spears has fired her new assistant, Shannon Funk after just three weeks on the job.

“Britney felt a lot of her recent troubles started and stopped with Shannon,” a Britney insider tells L&S. “Britney thought she was talking badly about her. She was very rude and Britney felt she was letting business emails fall by the wayside.”

Shannon was the replacement for Britney`s ousted cuz, and former flunky, Allie Simms.

“They have agreed to move forward as friends,” a mole says of the country cousins.

Hollywood Buzz: Britney Spears, Photo Shoot, Matt Damon, Ben

The latest report on Britney Spears isn`t so great. And I am reluctant to comment on it because one-sided stories aren`t completely accurate, however, here it is. OK!Magazine has publicly released a story on Spears` latest photo shoot that went awry. According to the publication, initially, they were very excited to work with the pop singer.

Angelina Jolie took movie role to be a

Actress Angelina Jolie has confessed that she took on her latest movie role so that she could be a �hero` to her children.

The actress, best known for her role as �Lara Croft` in the Tomb Raider movies has four children, five-year-old Maddox, three-year-old Pax, two-year-old Zahara and one-year-old Shiloh, with lover Brad Pitt – provides the voice of Tigress in �Kung Fu Panda`.

She said: “I`m doing �Kung Fu Panda`. I`m going to be a hero to my children. I`m the tiger and Jackie Chan`s in it, so I`m so cool.”

Meanwhile, Angelina and Brad and three of their children went bowling with good friend Mariane Pearl and her young son Adam.

The couple are currently holidaying in France and decided to treat the children and Mariane – who Angelina recently portrayed in the movie �A Mighty Heart` – to an afternoon at the local family fun centre �Le Palace`.

However, the day almost turned sour when Brad slipped on one of the lanes and hurt his back.

The centre`s owner, Patrick Bernard, said: “The children don`t have the strength to always get the ball down the lane, because it sometimes stops, so Brad thought he`d go down the lane to push it along. He slipped and fell on his back – hard!

“My wife was disappointed when Brad was OK and she missed her only chance in life to give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to Brad Pitt!”

Brad and the three boys – Maddox, Pax and Adam – also played air-hockey, while Angelina and Zahara chatted to Mariane.

Bernard added: “With only two lanes we`re certainly the smallest bowling in France, so we`re still having trouble realizing we spent Monday afternoon with the most famous couple in the world.”

Before leaving, Angelina and Brad personally thanked the Bernards – speaking a little French – and signed autographs for the couple`s 15-year-old daughter.

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Sushmita Sen to go Angelina Jolie way

Sushmita Sen already has the tag of Bollywood’s single mother. She had adopted a baby girl long time back and she truly dotes on her. Now, after her split with boyfirend Maanav Menon,� her daughter Renee is feeling alone and missing Menon coz the kid was very attached to him.

As a solution to this Sush is planning to adopt another baby girl to give company to Reene. Hope the decision helps to fill in Sush’s loneliness too!

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Angelina Jolie’s New Movie Role

Angelina Jolieis lending her voice to a new fantasy film called Beowulf. Here is the first image released from the movie. Here is a recap according to IMDB: The warrior Beowulf must fight and defeat the monster Grendel who is terrorizing towns, and later, Grendel`s mother, who begins killing out of revenge. Sounds interesting. Doesn`t the shot look a bit Tomb Raider-ish though?

Angelina Jolie has been transformed into the mother of Grendel the monster, the father of all evil from Anglo-Saxon mythology, for the adult fantasy film Beowulf. The actress stars alongside British actors Ray Winston, who plays her evil son, and Sir Anthony Hopkins who plays King Hrothgar.

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Brad Pitt and family went bowling

Brad Pitt and family went to French bowling alley as their holiday going to end. Mariane Pearl and her son also came along.

Le Palace Vert’s owner Patrick Bernard tells PEOPLE that once they arrived, the Jolie-Pitts, Pearl and the four children (Maddox, 5, Pax-Thien, 3, and Zahara, 2, and Adam Pearl, 5) hit the lanes. Well, guess they are too excited about the game.

Bernaed said “At one point though, because the children don’t have the strength to always get the ball down the lane, it sometimes stops. Brad thought he’d go down the lane to push it along. He slipped and fell on his back. Hard”0

Britney Spears Blows Her Nose on Designer Dresses

Britney’s left overs, plumbers photo archiveOn a recent photo shoot for OK magazine, Britney Spears was reported to have been a total meltdown.

Apparently, Britney was heavily medicated and at one point had her eyes rolling back in her head giving her that, I’m passing out look so desired by heroine chic photographers.

Representatives for OK mag. said they were torn over whether to bury the pics because they would devastate Britney’s career.

She took so many bathroom breaks during the shoot the staff thought she had the runs, every time she came out she was a different Britney than went in. At one point she became so paranoid she thought the ceiling of the building was going to fall on her head. The sky is falling Chicken Little in so many ways.

Plumbers had to be called in at one point in the shoot because one of Britney’s steamers had gummed up the works. Water was pouring all over the place.

Britney, one never to go ghetto, got greasy chicken and used the Gucci dress supplied for the shoot as a napkin. Not only did Brit use Gucci as finger napkins but when her little doggie made a mess of the floor Britney used a Chanel designer as a poop mop.

Now who can say Britney is trailer trash, trailer trash uses old plastic bags to clean up after their dogs. Not Britney, it’s new contour snot rags all the way.

From the desk of
Buck E Filbert
07/25/07

Britney Spears’ OK! Magazine Photo Shoot a Disaster

Britney Spears was set to grace the cover of OK! magazine and set the record straight about her private life. Unfortunately, in typical Britney fashion, things went awry. OK! has stated they will NOT publish any of the original photos they took during a photo shoot due to “legal reasons.” The reason may have to do with Britney threatening a lawsuit if her embarrassment she calls a photo shoot sees the light of day. To understand how badly the shoot went, here is a brief list of what occurred:

- Britney wiped her greasy hands on a $274 designer gown while eating her fried chicken lunch.

- Let her puppy poop on the floor and then cleaned it up with a $6,700 gown.

- Took frequent bathroom breaks with the door open and even brought her assistant in with her.

- Insisted her “friends,” not the hired professionals, do her hair and makeup

- Complained that the wardrobe provided by stylists wasn’t “sexy,” “short” or “tight” enough.

- Fled the shoot and interview before it was over – still wearing $14,526 worth of OK!’s borrowed clothing.

The photo shoot and interview was requested by Britney herself and was supposed to be the fallen pop star’s “comeback story and tell-all.” OK!’s editor-in-chief stated, “It was like a cry for help really, it wasn’t normal. We were all devastated. It was a tough decision to run with the story. We’re really hoping that it will provide a wakeup call for her and for the people around her.”

Britney Spears: ‘meltdown’ report

People.com, TMZ.com, news services

Skivvy-dipping, dirtying an expensive outfit and sailing with her sons sans life jackets � Britney Spears is back on the wild track. People reports in its Friday issue that on July 18, she and an unidentified gal pal stopped off in Malibu for an impromptu afternoon dip, with Brit wearing only her underwear, before a crowd of photographers.

Her erratic behavior continued the next day when, after filming a new video, she reportedly had a “meltdown” during an ill-fated photo shoot for OK! magazine. She apparently fretted that the ceiling might cave in and she wiped her hands on a couture gown after scarfing down fried chicken.

Finally, last Friday, she drew criticism for going boating with sons Sean Preston, 22 months, and Jayden James, 10 months, without life jackets.

Spears buys Liotta’s $8m mansion

Spears buys Liotta’s $8m mansion
25/07/2007 – 17:29:45

Britney Spears has splashed out $8m to purchase Ray Liotta’s Californian mansion, according to reports.

The pop superstar and mother-of-two is alleged to have made the offer on the five-bedroom property in the Pacific Palisades area of California, after placing her Beverly Hills mansion on the market following her split from Kevin Federline earlier this year.